2.03pm
Starting to write a bit later today.
Have had an eventful morning and haven't gotten around to sitting down and writing.
My morning started out pretty usual, although I still felt the whiplash from yesterday's anxiety, waking up unmotivated.
Did my oil pull, vinegar cleanse and lemon water.
I was surprise with receiving the paper samples in the mail today, which enhanced my day to be fantastic either way it goes.
By the time I got to work I felt extremly weak and needed food.
I got change for the store at the bank and on my way back, stopped by the grocery store to pick up fruit, a bottle of Acai juice and a fruit bar.
Eating Warermelon and the fruit bar as a late lunch around 12ish.
I had a chance to Skype my prince and mom for about an hour, while waiting for just a single customer to stop in and take a chance to perhaps find an accessory that would make my time standing here all worth while.
For now I'll try to keep myself occupied, all in company of my Smoothie consisting of Spirulana, Maca powder, Chia seeds, Acai juice and frozen berries. Yummm!
3.33pm
Still nothing happening in the store and I'm starting to get bored. Have so much for school that I would love to get done, but I'm missing need "umph!"
If nothing has not changed until 4ish, I will make a move towards something that will enlighten my day.
Fingers crossed that we get customers...
( or not, since now I have a plan ... )
9.52pm
Wow! Time flew by after I left work!
Lets reflect, shall we..
AD's and Society class started at 6pm. We watched a movie and wrote our thoughts down as an in-class activity.
Quite interesting how we all get manipulated into an unreal world, under unreal facts with unreal circumstances that only we alone, as individuals are responsible of. Just to be bigger and better then everyone else, rank higher then then norm in the social group you surround yourself with, to end up hoping to be remembered as someone great and die just like the rest of the world- alone.
Interesting, VERY interesting...
Really almost feels like a world I would shine like a star in, since in good at the study of humans the way I do. feeling out a different side only I can see.
But then that that would be like using black magic instead of white, while either or are bad.
Interesting...
I'll have to give that more thought.
10.00pm
But to continue on with reflecting, I ended up going to the grocery store, the one I was dreading going to yesterday, out of gear I would see the boy that have me a love letter about a week ago.
Ugh..
I really do feel bad. I don't like disappointing anyone. Especially if that has to do with the heart and thus emotions.
Ugh...
But I did go.
And I saw him.
I smiled and explained briefly that I am not one that can be with anyone and that I do think he is a kind person and I hope we will stay in touch way beyond him or I leaving the work location or the country.
So that was done. Another checked!
And then something very different happened. Two of my friends walked in and as happy as I felt like when seeing them, I felt caught. As if I shouldn't be doing what I'm doing.
My inner voice was speaking and I don't like the feeling of being caught. It's shameful and awkward, when all I need to do, is be good.
And then I won't feel caught.
12.27am
wrapping it up. I'm going to head to bed a whip out a good book to start reading. ahhh, I'm going to go for my big book of Brother Grimm's Fairytales and refresh my past memories. ( after a couple of games of Scrabble *teh*)
No comments:
Post a Comment